Thursday October 5, 2006

It never fails.  We cannot help ourselves, it seems.  We love to compare ourselves to others.  Favorably, of course!  We think that our whatever-it-is is the best.  We think that the other guy’s is lacking.  And we verbalize it.  Oh, it doesn’t sound too bad.  We have our ways of saying things to make them sound pretty and nonjudgmental.  The inference is there, of course.

It’s ugly.  You know it is if you’ve ever been on the receiving end of this sort of talk.  You come away angry, or hurt, or wondering if the other person is right. Wanna know what’s even worse?  Our children hear us when we do this, and before long, they’re doing the same thing!

It’s easy to spot in the kids, though.  They haven’t yet learned how to pretty up the ugly talk.  They just lay it out there!  The kids will talk about what grade they’re in, or what level math they’re working on and will, competitively, gladly indicate that they’re a level or two higher in their Saxon math, or not struggling with their spelling, or that they read through a certain work of literature at a faster speed.  I don’t like it much.

Recently, the 12 year old has reported some conversations he’s had with other home schooled boys that have come off as smacking of just this sort of talk. Fortunately, this time anyway, my son was on the receiving end of the negative comparison, and wasn’t the one dishing it out.  I think his feelings were hurt a bit, of course, and I’m sorry for that . I’d be more concerned if I’d found out he was on the “dishing it out” end of things.  Feeling what it’s like to be on the receiving end should help him understand better why this sort of talk is wrong.

I think we’re going to start working on Proverbs 27:2 – “Let another praise you and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips.”   We’ll talk about some examples of this that have occurred in our own home, and how to avoid boasting in ourselves.

We can team that verse with these:

Proverbs 15:33 – “The fear of the LORD teaches a man wisdom, and humility comes before honor“; and,

Proverbs 18:12 – “Before his downfall a man’s heart is proud, but humility  comes before honor.”

As in most things I find I need to teach my boys, I will be first in line for the lesson!

God bless you as you look well to the ways of your households!
Proverbs 31:27

Remember to pray for Karen.
The link to her site is under her lovely picture in my side bar.


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3 comments to Thursday October 5, 2006

  • Satan makes it so easy to fall into that comparison trap. Those are great scriptures thank you for sharing them 🙂

    Be blessed

  • This is a great post.  I know I struggle with this a lot.  I hear other homeschooling moms and what they are doing with their kids and it does sound pretty and it makes me question my own skills and if I am doing enough for my own kids.  It all comes down to “Am I glorifying God in all I am doing?”.  If so then I have nothing to feel ashamed about.

  • Amen, Howiesgal!!!  (good to hear from you!)